Oral History Interview with Kit D. Amidzich

[Interview Begins]

HALASKA: Today is December 9, 2019. This is an interview with Kit D. Amidzich who served with the US Army in the 25th Infanthree--Infantry Division from 2001 to 2004. The interview is being conducted at the Wisconsin Veterans Chamber of Commerce in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. The interviewer is Rachelle Halaska, and this interview is being recorded for the Wisconsin Veterans Museum Oral History Program, ah, for the "I Am Not Invisible" project. All right, thank you for meeting with me today, Kit.

AMIDZICH: Absolutely.

HALASKA: All right. So, we're just gonna start off. Um, when and where were you born?

AMIDZICH: I was born in [XXXXXXXXXX], Wisconsin. Uh, I was born on [XXXXXXXXX], uh, two thou-- or, two thousand--[XXXX].

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: I really wanna be young.

HALASKA: [laughs] Um, and tell me a little bit about what it was like--did you grow up in Oconomowoc?

AMIDZICH: No, I actually grew up in Delafield, Wisconsin.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: We lived on, like, Nagawicka Street right by the lake. And then, uh, we ended up moving over to, um, a block off of St. John's Military Academy which 00:01:00is located in Delafield, Wisconsin.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: So, I grew up mostly my, uh, younger years into my teen years were right off the St. John's Military Academy.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: It was pretty cool.

HALASKA: Yeah, yeah, really nice. Um, tell me about, um--tell me about growing up and education and your family and--yeah.

AMIDZICH: Yeah, absolutely. So, um, I come from a divorced home unfortunately.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: My parents divorced when I was right around ten years old.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: My mother had some college. My dad also had some college. My dad's an Air Force, um, veteran. He did three tours in Nam attached to Army. Um, my grandfathers were both Army, so it was kind of, you know, in the blood. I--[inaudible] I grew up--sorry.

HALASKA: No, it's okay.

AMIDZICH: My TBI [traumatic brain injury] kicks in here and there. Um, education for my parents. And then, um, just you wanna know about growing up in Delafield, 00:02:00like what I did or--?

HALASKA: Yeah, sure.

AMIDZICH: Um, so, Delafield back in the day, you know, like, we got to run rampant, didn't have to come home till the streetlights were on. So, um, I did a lot of just running amok around Delafield, fishing, you know.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Selling--selling the stuff to the fisher people that we caught in the lake or somethin' like that. It was really fun--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: --growing up in Delafield. Um, lived--like I said, lived right off St. John's Military Academy. And it's kinda one of the biggest reasons that I went into the military.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Um, tell me about--um, did your dad or your, uh, grandparents--uh, grandpas, did they talk about their military service much?

AMIDZICH: No. Actually, my dad being a Viet-- you know, three tours in Nam attached to Army--

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: --didn't really discuss his military career. However, we knew that there were issues. We could see 'em. I now know that I've witnessed my dad's night terrors. And, you know, he just was a little bit off on certain things. So, like, I knew that he was in the military. I knew he had some traumatic stuff when I was growing up.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, but, you know, watching it was kinda sad, but--

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: --knowing about it. Um, they didn't really talk about their military service unfortunately.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm. But, um, was--I'm guessing the military was held in high regard in your family though.

AMIDZICH: So, yeah, absolutely. I mean, but like I spoke to earlier, it--St. John's Military Academy was--

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: --truly the reason that I went into the military. I watched them outside my bedroom window running by in formation. I could hear taps. I could hear "Reveille". I could watch them on the obstacle course. I could see them around town in uniform. And it was just something that I craved and desired. But at the time they didn't take females, so I knew I couldn't go there. But I watched everything that they were doing. I was constantly riding my bike through the areas, you know, 'cause we were allowed to be on it.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: They didn't really say anything 'cause they knew we were--who we were. But it was just one of those things that I can still remember what my room looked like, what I was wearing, what it smelt like outside, the time of year 00:04:00when I decided at the age of thirteen this is what I'm doing with my life. I want to be in the military. I hadn't figured out what branch at that point, but I knew it was gonna happen.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Okay. Um, where--where'd you go to high school?

AMIDZICH: I went to high school at Kettle Moraine.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Great time there. Um, you know, I--I--I look back and think of how many recruiters came in and I don't really remember much of anything. I remember seeing a Marine once. I think I was about sixteen years old. They were outside the cafeteria during lunch talking about what the Marines could give you and stuff like that. And his--as soon as people kinda parted, I saw his uniform and I was just done. I was like that is sweet. [Halaska laughs] I mean, and they do. Even though I went Army, Marines have the best uniform. The dress blues are on point. And so, like, seeing him there and his presence and his--I mean, he wasn't high ranking, but he just gave off this, like, confidence. And I just--it just--one more thing that, like, really beefed up, like, I knew what I was doing with my life 'cause I saw it.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: So, I talked to him for a little bit. But the Marines ended up not being something that I wanted to entertain, so.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm. Um, when--so, you graduated from high school. Then what happened?

AMIDZICH: Ah, okay.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: So I actually graduated from high school, um, early.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: And then I took my parents to court with no lawyer and emancipated myself. Wasn't anything to do with, you know, not a g-- a safe household or anything like that.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: I just--I was done with school. I was ready to get out on my own. So, uh, my last semester of school, uh, my senior year I did, uh, half a s-- like, half a semester to graduate.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And, um, lived on my own, was supporting myself. So, as soon as I was done graduating and I--I graduated with decent--decent grades.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I was definitely a B student, you know, some A's. Um, but then I--then I made the decision that I was gonna move out to D.C.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Uh, my sister lived out in, uh, Winchester, Virginia. I had visited a couple times. But I absolutely fell in love with it because all of the military was there. And it just felt like home when I went there. Like, it was the craziest feeling to be around every branch that we have. And the--I'm s-- I'm into politics and I really am a junkie when it comes to, like, history. So, 00:06:00like, you have Gettysburg. And it was just--it's where I wanted to be. So, I ended up moving out there when I was just turned--I think I was almost eighteen--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: --when I moved out to D.C. Uh, that's when I started talking to recruiters--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: --tryin' to figure out, you know, what am I--what was I gonna do? Where was I gonna go?

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: So, that really, um, kinda boiled down to that--that pivotal moment we were talking about when it comes to September eleventh.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: But I really knew once I was there that I--I just had to figure out what branch I wanted to go to.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: I also wanted to live a little. You know, I wanted to be--I wanted to be a teenager. I wanted to be somebody that was just goin' out and havin' a good time. So, I didn't wanna join the military immediately, um, because I really wanted to feel which branch worked best for me.

HALASKA: Okay. Um, where--where were you living in D.C. and where were you working?

AMIDZICH: Uh, I was in Alexandria and then I kinda went to the--you know how everything kinda morphs there. It's a little bit of a border thing. So, like, Herndon, Virginia was only, like--you know, like, maybe a twenty-five minute drive into D.C. Um, I lived in Leesburg, Sterling. I kinda bounced around a little bit tryin' to figure out, you know--

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: --what the best town was for me. But, yeah, I lived in a couple places when I was in D.C., yeah.

HALASKA: Okay. And what kinda work were you doin'?

AMIDZICH: Uh, waitressing. I did fine dining waitressing. Um, and then I ended up challenging the executive chef to a mystery box 'cause I really wanted to get in the kitchen and there was a sous chef position open. Now, I come from a very long line of chefs in my family. We own a restaurant--

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: --in Delafield, uh--

HALASKA: Which restaurant?

AMIDZICH: Kurt's Steakhouse.

HALASKA: Oh, okay.

AMIDZICH: My cousin bought it off my dad, um, many years ago. But Kurt's Steakhouse is a great place to go, such good food. So, I grew up--I mean, I can remember being two years old and mixing things with my gran-- my godmother and stuff like that. So, um, I actually challenged him and I--I said, "If I beat you or they can't tell who made the dish, can I get the position?" And he's like, "Yeah," 'cause he thought I--he had no idea. And then I didn't beat him but they couldn't tell who made the dish so he gave me the position.

HALASKA: Nice.

AMIDZICH: So, I was actually working as a sous chef.

HALASKA: What did you make?

AMIDZICH: Um, it was--I had some weird food. I had a fish. I don't even remember what kind of fish. Fish, some weird mushrooms, asparagus, and some rice. And I had to come up with something that was amazing. So, I just--I remember I stuffed the fish, baked it, you know, did a bunch of crazy stuff to poachin' it and--I--it turned out really great, so. [laughs]

HALASKA: Oh, awesome.

AMIDZICH: Yeah, I was proud of myself. I was like my platin' looks good. [laughter] So, yeah, so that's where I was, um, until I joined the service.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: I was a sous chef.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Yeah, it was fun. Five star restaurant in Leesburg, Virginia at Lansdowne Hotel and Resort.

HALASKA: Oh, okay.

AMIDZICH: Yeah. It was pretty fun.

HALASKA: What was the restaurant called again?

AMIDZICH: The Grill.

HALASKA: The Grill? Okay.

AMIDZICH: Mm-hmm, yep.

HALASKA: Uh, do you have any, uh, interesting or fun memories that you wanna share from your time there?

AMIDZICH: Uh, yeah actually. I have tons. It was such an amazing job. I mean, I worked really, really hard. And at the time, I was making a great wage for my 00:09:00age because I w-- you know, I had taken that position. Uh, just amazing teamwork. I think one of my favorite memories was, um, my kitchen--my night kitchen staff--I tended to close a lot, so I did the, you know, in-house cooking, uh, for room service and everything.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: But they didn't speak any English and I was not good at Spanish. And so we actually, like, really worked hard together to immun-- to communicate to each other. And I was really good with my kitchen Spanish by the time I left there.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: 'Cause we just--we both--they worked on their English. I worked on my Spanish. But we just came together like a team. Even though there was a barrier, 00:10:00we just made it work. It was--it was a lotta fun.

HALASKA: Nice.

AMIDZICH: I enjoyed those women and I truly miss them.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: It was a really good time I had with them.

HALASKA: Cool, cool.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Um, all right. Well, what--what year did you start lookin' at joining the military again then?

AMIDZICH: So, right around '99.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: When I got there, I started to look at what branch would I fit into. Did I wanna go active duty? Did I wanna do Reserve or National Guard? How was I gonna fit into the military? What was gonna be the best thing for me? And so I actually was going, um, National Guard--

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: --for Army. I had picked Army. I knew Army was where I wanted to be. It felt right. It was--it just--you just n-- I just knew. So, National Guard, started talkin' to recruiters in probably right around that '99, 2000 mark. And they were like, "Okay, this is what you need. This is all your paperwork. Take your ASVAB [Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery]. Do all that stuff." So, I was prepping, like, really. I was gonna do delayed entry, um, just 'cause I wanted to, you know, work it out with my work schedule and all that stuff.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Uh, but then September eleventh hit and that changed everything for me.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Um, walk me--walk me through that--that day, um, being in Washington--

AMIDZICH: Yeah, I--

HALASKA: --D.C. area and--

AMIDZICH: I actually lived in Leesburg, Virginia at the time--

HALASKA: Okay, Leesburg.

AMIDZICH: --of 9/11, which FAA [Federal Aviation Administration] was my backyard. That's--literally they were--there was a big fence and the FAA was right there.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Um--

HALASKA: And what's the FAA, just to--?

AMIDZICH: Uh, the FAA is the--oh gosh, you're askin' me. It's the Flight s-- I 00:11:00don't remember the acronym. But it's--it's our ne-- uh, flight pattern stuff.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Everything that has to do with the air space.

HALASKA: Got it.

AMIDZICH: And I remember getting a phone call from my mother and norma-- like, I worked late that night so I slept in late so it was about--it was right after the first plane crashed into Tower 1, I believe. And, uh, sh-- I get a c-- phone call. It woke me up. And I grabbed it and I remember my mom saying, "The country's under attack. You need to get up. Where are you? What's going on? Are you okay? Are you safe? Um, I haven't heard from your sisters." Both my sisters worked right next to The Pentagon--

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: Um, for a--a booking company. And, um--and I was so sh-- I was like, 00:12:00"What are you talking about?" Like, I was so confused. You know, I'm waking up. And then I get up and I realize, oh, no, she's--she's absolutely right. Went and turned on the TV and was just shock. I think shock is the best word for most people. Um, but anger and frustration immediately came out, like, how dare they attack my country.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: My patriotic duty, uh, ramped up a little bit. You could say that in the least. Except they shut down all the roads and they wouldn't let us out of our apartment complex. They wouldn't let us drive anywhere.

HALASKA: Wow.

AMIDZICH: Everything was shut down 'cause we were right next to the FAA. And they--they knew there was another plane out there. They didn't know what was 00:13:00going on. I mean, it was just total collective chaos, right. So, I walked to my sister's house, which was three, four miles.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And got to my older sister-- she stayed home that day 'cause she wasn't feeling good. But my middle sister went to work. And we were in--we w-- she was trying to contact her and see if she was okay and all that stuff. And finally the phones--'cause, you know, the phone systems were shutdown 'cause everybody was calling everybody. So, we finally got through to my sister and found out that she was safe. They made it to work before the plane crashed into The Pentagon, but that they could see the smoke and it was really bad and there was total collective chaos down there. Uh, firefighters came in and gave 'em all masks to wear because the smoke was so incredibly bad that it was billowing into their office. But they [laughs] really couldn't leave 'cause they weren't letting anybody go anywhere, which was really scary. And, um, we were glued to the TV. And I just remember--sorry.

HALASKA: No, you're okay.

AMIDZICH: [shows emotion] I just remember, um, feeling so helpless, like, I 00:14:00can't do anything. How am I supposed to help these people? I've gotta get to--to--to f-- to New York. Uh, we were only roughly a four and a half hour drive away. And I was makin' all these plans and I was calling all these people like, "We need to go up there. We need to volunteer. We need to take supplies. We need to do this." Like, I can't just sit and watch this. And then the second tower got hit, and I just broke down and lost it.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And, obviously, it's still a very emotional moment for me 'cause it changed my life completely. [sniffles]

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, my sister finally got home really late that night. Um, and she had soot on her. Like, she was--it was--it hit home.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: I lost some friends at The Pentagon. Um, they were doing duty there. And, uh, so, it was really an emotional moment for me. Uh, couple days later I got through to my recruiter and said, "All right, active duty, four years, let's go."

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And [inaudible] one of those moments where I was like that's it. Let's do it. Like, there wasn't even a hiccup. He's like, "For real?" And I'm like, "Really? You're gonna ask me for real in this moment?" I said, "Next basic training get me out." And so that was September l-- like, fourteenth, fifteenth, whatever it was that following Monday. And I shipped out to basic training on November 22, 2001 ready to go. And I believe the--the next day or the day after was Thanksgiving. So, I spent my [laughs]--my Thanksgiving in a MEPS [Military Entrance Processing Stations] chow hall. [laughter] So, um--which isn't much of anything depending on which one you go to. But I just remember the night before, you know, they stick you in a hotel room before you head out to basic. And--and 00:16:00I locked my door and I shut my curtains and I turned on the TV. And I remember just sitting there with very minimal stuff 'cause you can't bring a ton with you, right, just a change of clothes and your--your--your folder with all your personal items in it and your ID and all that. And I remember just sittin' in the room goin'--like, I was so excited. Everybody's like, "You're not gonna sleep." No, I went to bed, not a problem. I was ready. Up at 3:30, let's get on the bus, let's do this.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Like, I was so ready to--to do it.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: So, I shipped out and, you know, got all my gear. And I just remember everybody at the--the station just being, like, nervous and anxious and what are we getting into and all that stuff. And, like, coming f-- coming from a military family, before I left I asked my dad, "What's the best thing I can do when I'm at basic training?" And he said, "Volunteer for everything first. And remember they can't break you unless you let them. So, it's a mental game. Just remember 00:17:00it's always gonna be a mental game for them."

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And I was like, oh, well, I like these things. Let's do this. [Halaska laughs] So, I remember getting off the bus that day. And one of the girls dropped her bag and the drill sergeant's screamin' at her. I literally ran passed her, grabbed her bag, grabbed the back of her shirt with my bag on the back and said, "Move out, girl. Let's go." And we're still friends to this day.

HALASKA: Oh, nice.

AMIDZICH: She's like, "You literally st--" like, she's like, "I panicked in that moment. I've never been screamed at like that." And I have 'cause I played sports all my life and I'm a smartass. So, [Halaska laughs] I was used to it and she wasn't. You know, she came from a very, um--she came--finding out later she came from a very wealthy family who was not--not happy about her choice, but she felt it was her patriotic duty same way. And so she was just like, "Ah, I've never been yelled at and I've never had to do this dirty stuff." So, it was funny watching her 'cause she ended up being in my, uh, platoon so it was really fun--

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: --to work with Klose [??], good person. But, yeah, I just--basic training was the best thing ever. I loved every second of it.

HALASKA: And where--where'd you go to training?

AMIDZICH: I went to, uh, Fort Jackson.

HALASKA: Oh, okay.

AMIDZICH: As they call it, "Relaxin' Jackson".

HALASKA: Fort Jackson.

AMIDZICH: Yup, Fort Jackson was amazing. Um, got there, pumped, excited, and it never stopped.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: I contin-- I--there was never a moment I thought at basic training why am I here, why am I here.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Nope, not one. I loved every minute. And I was s-- selected as soldier of White Phase. Um, so you have the Red, White, and Blue Phase. Uh, soldier of White Phase got to shoot the AT4 grenade rocket launcher at a Bradley and I hit it. And I was the first female to shoot it in seven years and hit it, so I was pumped. Kept my, uh, safety pin that I had to pull. Um, put it in my l-- locker. And that's what I gave my dad on graduation because I graduated, um, February 16, 2002 and that was my daddy's birthday. [laughs]

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: So, I was able to give him that and a little card that I had made for him. And he still has the pin to this day 'cause he thought it was just, like, the coolest thing that I could've given him. And he was super proud that day. So was I, yeah.

HALASKA: Yeah, yeah. Um, what--what were the, uh--what was Fort Jackson like? Like, what were the training facilities like?

AMIDZICH: We actually had really shitty training facilities. Uh, the female barracks were, um, under construction so they stuck us in this older unit. The gentlemen's side had already been fixed and finished, so they were in the new building. Um, we didn't have hot water.

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: So, we had to take cold showers every day for--and it wasn't--we weren't--weren't in there too long.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Uh, probably about, like, two or three weeks. My AIT [Advanced Individual Training] was very long. I was Signal Support Systems Specialist, so it's Signal Corps Communications. And we had to learn radios and a-- all this top secret and all this other stuff--

HALASKA: Mm, mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: --that we had to do for, you know, oh, setting up OE-254s. So, it was actually a very long AIT.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: I think we were there just about seven months, which is really long.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Um, but we moved it--the barracks were--once they finished our side, 00:20:00it was--they were gorgeous 'cause they were brand new. [laughs]

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, on-- unfortunately, we had to get locked in at night. So, the women--

HALASKA: In basic training?

AMIDZICH: Yeah, AIT not basic.

HALASKA: Oh, okay.

AMIDZICH: Basic training we were segregated obvious-- I mean, they're gonna separate men and women--

HALASKA: Oh, okay.

AMIDZICH: --during tr-- you know, for nighttime and showering and all that purposes. But, um, everybody was locked in at night. That wasn't, you know--but only the women had to be locked in, so we would literally be watching the men play games like ping-pong and watch TV 'cause we didn't have those facilities in our section. And we would all be sitting at the glass, like, just hating on 'em. But it was for our protection, so that, you know, the guys wouldn't come over and rape us. And I'm like, well, tell 'em to get their shit together so that we can hang out 'cause, like, this is crap.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: But every night we were locked in by 9 p.m. during the week.

HALASKA: Hmm.

AMIDZICH: Yep, [laughter in background] super fun.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Had to pull fire watch. That was even more fun. But I enjoyed it 'cause they had re-- they had speakers in our hallways.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I don't know if they had 'em in the male, but they had speakers in our hallways that went directly to the drill sergeant's office so they could hear us. So, of course, what did I do? I sang "The Army Song" and I walked up and dow-- 'cause I was there for four hours. I sang the national anthem. I sang [laughs] "God Bless America". All I did was sing and study.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: That's all I did during fire watch. So, annoyed the hell outta the drill sergeants but what are they gonna do. Tell me to be quiet.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: They locked me in a room. That's how I looked at it. So, I made the best of it.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I never got mad. Thought it was crap, realized there's nothing I could do to change it, so I made the best of it. That's kinda how AIT went for me.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: AIT was a blast. Um, AIT was actually in Fort Gordon.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: And that is in Georgia. And, uh, that was amazing.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: That was amazing.

HALASKA: And what was your, um, MOS [Military Occupational Specialty] again?

AMIDZICH: Uh, 31 Uniform. I believe it's 25 Series now. And it was Signal Support Systems Specialist, Signal Corps, so.

HALASKA: Okay. And, uh, tell me about what--I know you k-- you, uh, very quickly went over--

AMIDZICH: Yeah, yeah.

HALASKA: --the different things that you learned. But take me through, um, what you learned, um, and what that job is.

AMIDZICH: So, tha-- so, basically we are the keepers of the radios. We set up 00:22:00OE-254s for communications.

HALASKA: What's that?

AMIDZICH: OE-254 is a, uh, antenna.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: And it basically--it's roughly right around I wanna say, like, packaged. It was 150 pounds I'm guessing on that one. But we had to hump it out, set it up. And they made you set it up by yourself and pull it up by yourself to show that you could do it. Holy crap that was hard, but I did it.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Like, um--

HALASKA: What was your strategy for gettin' it up?

AMIDZICH: Uh, I used--[laughs] listen kids. Geometry does come into play in your life. Um, [laughter] I actually looked at--I did an angle projection.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Um, it had so much bend in it so I knew if I sat up where my pull 00:23:00point was that I was pulling it at the point that would help arch it up.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: So, I actually used [laughs] geometry to kinda build off that and see where I could pull up. And I actually was the first female, um, on the first try that got it up.

HALASKA: Nice.

AMIDZICH: So, it felt really good to kinda show my--'cause I'm--I'm stout and strong. I've always been that way all my life.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: But it was just one of those moments where it was like--you know, we still were dealing with the women weren't smart enough and women weren't strong enough and women shouldn't do this and women shouldn't do that. So, it was really good to prove 'em wrong.

HALASKA: Where was--where was that coming from?

AMIDZICH: That's coming from our male counterparts.

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: Um, I can definitely tell you that n-- ninety percent of it was competitive and not sexist--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: --in AIT. Um, there were a few of those guys that were kinda rollin' in that were just wankers that just didn't grasp the concept that we were all in 00:24:00this together.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: But mostly it was just sup-- 'cause the guys were cheerin' me on. [pounding] They were yellin' for me to pull it up, you know.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And--and I did. And that was diggin' deep, literally digging deep, my heels in the mud pullin' up. It was tough, but good moment for me. Um, I became student, uh, platoon sergeant. And then, uh, student ser-- student first sergeant, uh, which I got nominated by my peers for all of these positions. And I ended my AIT career as command ser major.

HALASKA: Oh, nice.

AMIDZICH: Mm-hmm. I marched 300 plus students to school, to chow, back from chow, and back home. I had to have accountability of every single one of 'em. I needed to know exactly where they were, if they were a sick call, if they were phased out, if they were recycled. I had to know everything about--

HALASKA: Mm--hmm.

AMIDZICH: --my whole entire--whole entire battalion. Was it battalion?

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Yeah, somethin' like that. [laughs]

HALASKA: What was your, uh, strategy for keepin' track of all that?

AMIDZICH: So, actually what I did is during one of my fire watches I got a 00:25:00calculator from the drill sergeant. And so we would--we had so many per row and so many rows per platoon.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: So, they'd sound off and they'd say "One, two, three, four." And then when you would get to the end it would say, like--like, the last platoon would be, like, "One, two, three, four, plus two," because they only had two people in their fifth row. So, what I did is I built a sheet, a cheat sheet.

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: And it was everything over ten rows times how many people per row, so that it was [snaps fingers] an immediate number to the drill sergeant. I didn't have to count. I didn't ha-- all I had to do was add the--add the extra people that were in and then I would--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: --do a report for sick call and report for phase out and report for, um, uh, recycles. And then I would subtract the number and could give it to the drill sergeant within three minutes of the whole entire, you know, battalion sounding off.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: So, he was really, really impressed by the fact that I took the time 00:26:00to do that so that it was quick, easy, painless, done, go. Let's move out.

HALASKA: Nice.

AMIDZICH: 'Cause there were other--when, uh--when--I was the last command ser major--student command ser major, um, before we graduated. And--and he was like, "Way to show 'em all up." I ended up winning the drill sergeant leadership award. Um, I still have my coin.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Still very proud of it. Um, for PT [physical training] for testing, I was, um, ninety-eight percent in my schooling, uh, leadership. Just was there constantly helping my battles [??] out that were havin' a hard time figuring out something I could.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I just took the initiative to be a leader 'cause that's just who I was.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I've always been that way my whole life. I can go back to being four and seeing me like, "No, we're gonna do this," and, like, pulling all these little kids with me. Like, it was just something--like, I'm just built to lead. That's just how--how I am.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: But AIT was amazing. Gosh, I loved it. I loved every second of it. I was just pumped to be there. Ready to--ready to take on the Army, ready to take on the real deal, you know.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Basic, AIT, that's a façade. It's not what you're really getting into.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: It's just prepping for, um, what your job is and the standards that they're setting.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: But the real Army is--is the real test.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Um, just a little bit more information about--

AMIDZICH: Sure.

HALASKA: --your, um--your AIT.

AMIDZICH: Mm-hmm.

HALASKA: And just, like, what--what you learned--

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: --because you're, I think, one of the first people I've interviewed who's had this job.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: So--okay, so, it's this big antenna that you put up, and that supports all the radios?

AMIDZICH: Mm-hmm.

HALASKA: All the other radios for the--?

AMIDZICH: Yep. So, the--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Yeah, that helps set up communications. It connects points so that everybody can talk. Um, but we also did, like, Cat 5 cables. We learned how to build those and wire those.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: And so it was really, truly, like, a full comms person--

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: --that could come in and--and--and--and really get into the nitty gritty about it, so.

HALASKA: Okay. Um, I guess, was there any equipment that was, like, easier and more fun and good to use than others or--?

AMIDZICH: No, we ac--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: On--sadly and unfortunately at the time of me going through AIT, we were working off the old equipment.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Equipment that w-- they don't even make. [laughs] But, you never know when you would have to use it.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Like, let's say sh-- shit got blown up and then you had to pull out this old stuff. I mean, it was just what we had to do. I remember sitting in a Bradley with comms on my head calling--learning how to, like, do the proper radio keys, getting it set up, getting on the right frequency, and then trying to talk to my battles in different areas of the camp.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And, uh, I actually have a picture of me in a Bradley with headphones on looking at a radio that my--that they had taken. And my dad had the same picture in a Bradley with com-- 'cause he was comms for Air Force. So, I actually--that was just kind of a cool moment.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: You know, remembering that. Like, I wa-- like, it's just so cool to see, like, 'cause I have the pictures side by side for my dad. I made him, like, a Father's Day gift with it.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: So, pretty proud of that moment. It was--it was--it--it's just a really great way to kinda connect with my family.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Yeah. But we basically were just signal support. We're--we're comms. We're communications. We're making sure that everybody can talk during war.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And making sure that we have secure lines, and.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm. Um, during this time, uh, that you were in basic and AIT, what was, I guess, the word or the talk about the conflicts that were starting out.

AMIDZICH: You're goin' to war.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Get ready to fight.

HALASKA: Okay. And--

AMIDZICH: This isn't--this isn't an if, it's just a when.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Be ready. You're going to go to war.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: You are going to have to make sure that your mind is ready for that.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Yeah. There was no--there was no candy-coating. They didn't try to, like, play it out to be something else.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: We also didn't know what kind of war we were getting into.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Um, but we definitely were--were consistently--there was no message of don't worry, you're [inaudible] won't go. We are the [laughs]--we have to go.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm, yeah.

AMIDZICH: You need comms. It's just part of the job. So, we were all prepared mentally quite a bit.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm, yeah.

AMIDZICH: They talked to it.

HALASKA: Um, you said that you got an award for, uh, PT as well. Can you tell me a little bit about what the PT standards were for you at the time and how you--how you [inaudible]?

AMIDZICH: Oh, my gosh. Yeah, I--I was, uh, top four female in the--

HALASKA: Nice.

AMIDZICH: --whole entire AIT or basic training period. Um, I never looked at female standards. I always tried to make the male standards when it came to the run and the push-ups. Sit-ups were the exact same.

HALASKA: Yep.

AMIDZICH: Um, I remember my--I'm a terrible runner. I am. I'm not gonna lie. I was not a good runner. My best time ever--my best PT score ever was a 289 out of 00:31:00300. Um, the push-ups I did seventy-seven of them. Sit-ups were maxed out. I think I did, like, eighty-nine, ninety, something absurd.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Which I wish I had those abs again. [laughter] And then, um, run was rough. It was a rough run. But I pushed as hard as I could. I ended up throwing up at the end because I gave it everything I had. And I scored an eighty-nine percent on it, which was the best I've ever done. So, I--I got, you know, recognized for that with the--

HALASKA: Yeah, excellent.

AMIDZICH: It was amazing. It was good, yeah. The guys always joked about me and told me that they liked my guns because I was such a smartass that the drill sergeants made me do tons of push-ups. And then we got to the point where they were marking every hundred with a permanent marker on my arm, like, as a joke. I had guns. I was lean. [laughter] I loved it though. I loved PT. I loved getting up in the morning and running. I was like, "We're gonna go do PT." They're like, 00:32:00"Shut up Amidzich," [laughter] so.

HALASKA: That's awesome.

AMIDZICH: Mm-hmm.

HALASKA: Um, uh, are there any other, uh, memories or specific moments or people, uh, that you wanna recognize and talk about from basic and AIT before we move on?

AMIDZICH: Yeah, basic was, um, [background conversation] Broman, Matthew Broman.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: He's a--I believe he's a captain now in the National Guard in Nebraska. If it weren't for him, I don't think I would've pushed as hard. It's such a great co-- like, just a great chemistry between us.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Uh, he was first in the male order. I was first in the female order. So, we ended up being battles 'cause they did it by--across. That's how they did it. They wanted you workin'--they wanted it integrated 'cause that's how the battlefield was gonna be.

HALASKA: Nice.

AMIDZICH: He was a PT stud. I think he ran his, like, two mile in, like, ten minutes. It was absurd. It's absurd. The kid is a freak of nature. [Halaska laughs] He's, like, solid rock, two percent body fat, ninja, just [makes sound] hawk eye. He ended up getting forty outta forty in the shooting. And I was like, "Yes, you're such a badass." But we pushed each other. And he was just--he was 00:33:00p-- to this day, I know that if I ever needed him he'd be there. Uh, AIT was definitely Gallagher [??]. That's my girl. We're still friends today. She--again, she was--we were all about competition with each other, but it was healthy.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Like, she was, uh, the first one to get nominated for, uh, student platoon sergeant. And I was like, dang it, 'cause we were goin' up against each other. But she could run, I couldn't run. She beat me in the PT. [Halaska laughs] But to this day, again, like, I know that no matter what, I could always call on her. But she got me through it. She was my battle. She was my rock. We had both went through tough times during AIT. It's--it's not easy for testing. It's not easy for the mental strains that they put upon you. I ended up getting hypothermia when we were in the field once. And she just made sure that I was taken care of and got me to the drill sergeant tent 'cause I was hallucinating at that point. It was bad. I got hypothermia to the tee. In South Carolina, which is weird, but it was freezing.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: But those were the two people that really got me through AIT and basic.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And we're still friends to this day.

HALASKA: Oh, excellent.

AMIDZICH: Yeah, yeah. Good people.

HALASKA: Um, what was your first duty station?

AMIDZICH: Fort--my first and only duty station was Joint Base Lewis-McChord, Fort Lewis at the time, in Seattle, Washington.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Tacoma technically, but we won't--yep.

HALASKA: Okay. And when--when'd you go there?

AMIDZICH: Uh, so, after gradued-- graduated AIT, I did two weeks of hometown recruiting--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: --um, in Virginia. You know, you just walk around a mall in uniform and try to get people to come in. And it's something that you n-- you don't have to take it. [clapping noise]

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: But a lot of people do take it just because--'scuse me. Because it's two free weeks to be with your family, you know.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Uh, so after that, um, I actually drove my best friend who I went into the military with--uh, she was an MP [Military Police], Rachel Modgelin [??] at 00:35:00the time. Um, she was already deployed. She literally went to basic a month before me, uh, and then got deployed to Guantanamo Bay the minute she hit Fort Lewis.

HALASKA: Wow.

AMIDZICH: So, I took her car from D.C. 'cause we were friends in D.C.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, and then I drove it cross country to s-- Washington state. And stopped in Nebraska and spent a whole entire week with Broman and his family. It was such a bla-- we had such a blast, great people. And then, uh, moved on, just made my way across the country and got to Fort Lewis. And Signal Corps is where I checked into after Reception Battalion, and pretty awesome.

HALASKA: Yeah. Um, had you ever driven cross country before?

AMIDZICH: Oh, yeah, yeah.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Cross country for me wasn't--wasn't an issue.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: I had driven it a couple times.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, just for vacation and stuff with my family.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Well, my sisters and things like that. We drove from Wisconsin to D.C. all the time.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And I've drove out before, so yeah.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Cross country is fun. I've done it six times since by myself, a couple times with people, so. [laughs] I know it very well. Every route. [laughter]

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Um, tell me what it was like getting to Fort Lewis.

AMIDZICH: Woo, Reception Battalion.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: That one's a fun one. That's where yo-- that's where you check in.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And, uh, they hold you for x amount of time till they put you in whatever unit you're gonna go to. Um, so I was there. That's where I met, um, some really cool people.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And we all got kinda dispersed across Fort Lewis at the time. And I ended up in 365 Signal Corps. I may be off on the date--the name, but that's where I [laughs] ended up was the Signal Corps with, uh--they were kind of like a sublet of the HHC [Headquarters and Headquarters Company], 1-25th.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: And, uh, my basic training friend Menno [??]went basic, we went to AIT together. We got stationed in Fort Lewis together. We ended up in the same unit and barracks.

HALASKA: Oh, nice.

AMIDZICH: So, it was hilarious, yeah. So, we en-- we were just together that whole stretch until I got chosen over her to go to HHC. So, I was only with s-- 00:37:00the signal company for maybe a month--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: --before they pulled me up to HHC.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Headquarters.

HALASKA: Um, and what were your duties then at HHC?

AMIDZICH: Same exact thing I did f--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: What you get schooled for is how they integrate you in, um, to your unit.

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: So, like, Signal, I was just doing the same thing. Like, everybody was doing, like, rotations around, you know, learning the radio systems, the new ones, and how we key 'em and everything, like, you know, comms sack [??]and all that stuff like that, so. But then when I moved to HHC, I got stuck with, um, the S6 shop, which is Signal. It's got, you know, like, people who fix the radios. Uh, that would be me. Well, not fix 'em but manage the radio, sensitive items. We also worked in S6 was our, uh, Bravos, 31 Bravos, 25 Series now. Um, they were, like, the IT [information technology]. They fixed our computers. They 00:38:00uploaded things. They could do all of the Cat 5 cables and run everything to make sure that our comms were up internally.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: It was fun--

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: --until it wasn't. But it was fun. Like, I was excited to be at HHC. I was excited to be--um, I was only f-- I was--in my office, I was the only female, so.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Uh, Sterling [??], Reed [??], Mendoza [??], those were my people.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: But yeah.

HALASKA: Um, what was--uh, well, wh-- what's Fort Lewis like to someone who's never been there?

AMIDZICH: I love--oh my gosh, I love the Pacific Northwest. It is the most beautiful, beautiful area. Mount Rainier, the Olympic Peninsula, Steilacoom Lake, all of it. Uh, when I got there, I was so excited. I loved Seattle, loved Sea-- I had been to Seattle before I moved, before I chose my duty station. So, I fell in love with Seattle. Uh, it was great. Th-- they were rebuilding, doing a ton of rebuild.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: So, they got brand new barracks, brand new--they were revamping all of the barracks. We had North Fort that was, like, the high-tech ninja people, like, worked over there. And, um, they did brand new housing and they were redoing this-- the commissar-- I mean, everything was getting ren-- like, revamped and renewed. So, it was so exciting to be there during the build time 'cause it just got more and more beautiful.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: But we had ma-- a McChord Air Force Base. There was a back road that connected it.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And you could literally see when you drove through, it'd be, like, brown grass and then all of a sudden the grass was green and then you knew you were on McChord. [laughs] 'Cause the Air Force has a little bit more money that they throw at their--at their airmen and women. [laughs] But, uh, yeah, no, it was great. It was great working with them too. Like, I got to work with Air Force quite a bit, you know. They have communications people that need to talk to us when we're out. So, it was great.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Beautiful, friendly, like, th-- the--the people were used to the military community being there, so it was just great to be back into a military community.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Yeah. It was wonderful.

HALASKA: Um, did you--uh, what'd you guys do for fun? Like, what'd you--what'd you go out and do?

AMIDZICH: Uh, we--we went to Seattle quite a bit.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: And ate out and went to the farmer's market. And, like, a lot of trivia nights at the bars and just, uh, Misfits Thanksgiving and Misfits Christmases. You know, it really was a--a true community. We all battled up. You know, there were a lot of people who couldn't go home for the holidays. You know, I was usually on duty 'cause I was the lowest rank. Um, so I ended up just--we just made it work. We had a bunch of people over at the house all the time. Took keys, hid 'em, they had to spend the night. We had twenty people one time sleeping in our house all over the place.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Because we just wanted them to feel like they mattered. We didn't care what rank you were when you came to the house. It was just like, let's have Christmas.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: So, we had, you know, E7s all the way down to me, E2s, yeah.

HALASKA: Yeah, and--

AMIDZICH: Never officers. We didn't invite them. [laughter]

HALASKA: They can't come anyway.

AMIDZICH: They can't play with us anyway, yeah.

HALASKA: Um, and you said at--at the house. So, did you--?

AMIDZICH: At my house, yeah.

HALASKA: Did you live off base then?

AMIDZICH: I did.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: I, uh--I had gotten married, great guy.

HALASKA: Tell me about that, yeah.

AMIDZICH: Oh, we met at Reception Battalion. They alwa-- and my drill sergeant jokingly said, "Don't marry the first guy you meet at Reception Battalion." [Halaska laughs] Well, I didn't listen. Great guy though. Mis-- Dennis Clark [??] is a stand-up human. He really is. He was a combat medic, great guy.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Just didn't work out unfortunately.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Got married a little too young maybe.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: You know, but, uh--so, I was already off post.

HALASKA: Okay, yeah.

AMIDZICH: So, I had housing that I could keep. But we--we, uh, we alw-- me and my--my best friend, Lisa--she's a master sergeant now. Uh, she--she and I met. She was my supply sergeant at my--at the HHC and we just clicked.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Yeah. We just--even though she was an E5 and I was an E2, she just--she really did teach me a lot about the military and how to fight through the female problems that you would come in-- you know, you got that. It's--it's 00:42:00just part of the--the thing. You put men and women together, there's always gonna be a little bit of a weird dynamic until they learn how to work with each other. But she taught me how to navigate that pretty well, so.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: It--she was a big help, big supporter, yeah.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm, okay.

AMIDZICH: We're still friends to this day.

HALASKA: Oh, good.

AMIDZICH: She's my daughter's godmother. So, yeah. [laughs]

HALASKA: Mm-hmm. Um, okay. So, tell me, um--tell me, uh, a little bit more about, um, kind of what your time at--at Fort Lewis and kinda what happened there.

AMIDZICH: Sure, yeah. I got there excited, get over to HHC ready to do this. You know, learning all the nuances of being, you know, at a headquarters and working directly with, you know, some high--high officials because they come into the building quite a bit. And just learning the nuances of my job and just trying to learn how to integrate what I learned from AIT into the real deal.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, I was pumped. I was ready to do this, so excited. Uh, then I get to my--I get--you know, Sergeant Reed was in charge of me. And--and unfortunately, he'd never worked with women. He was--he was, uh, a--a guy that got re-classed and was not a good leader. Um, so, when I first started there, I was like, all right, super pumped, wanted to learn everything, wanted to get 00:43:00involved in everything. 'Cause again my mindset was lead by example, so I wanted to make sure that I was volunteering for everything. And sadly, he would be doing a fielding event where they were issuing radios out to somebody who's doing, like, the back forty field exercise prepping to go to war. And he'd be, like, "Clean the office." And I'd be like, "Uh, but don't I need to--" "Don't talk back to me. I'm your sergeant." And I was, like, you know, E2 right outta AIT, "Roger that Sergeant." That lasted a couple weeks until I was like, "Hey Sergeant, like, you gonna teach me my job?" Would you like--can I--can I--can I go to 520 to pick up radios so I know what it's like to, like, turn in a broken thing and get a good thing back? And how I would, like, do all the paperwork through the Supply. And just had no desire to teach me, no desire to work with me, kept me very much, um--he said he kept me in my place. That was his favorite saying. Like, "I'm just gonna keep you in your place." And I was like, "So, you want me to clean the office and, like, do all the details?" I literally got CQ 00:44:00[Charge of Quarters] all the time, staff duty all the time. I was tasked out to all these, like, cleaning things, painting fences. I never learned my job from him.

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: He refused to teach me, so I learned how to navigate the system.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm. [laughs] Um, I want you to tell me about navigating the system--

AMIDZICH: Yes.

HALASKA: --in just one second. Um, di-- were there other ser-- or soldiers that were also under him, like--?

AMIDZICH: Yes.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Sergeant Mendo-- or, uh, Specialist Mendoza and Specialist Sterling.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Um, and they tried to fight for me. They did. They were--they're--they're amazing humans.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, I'm not in touch with them anymore but every once in a while I 00:45:00hear through the grapevine how they're doin'.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: But they did. They're like, "Sergeant Reed, can I take Amidzich?" And he'd be like, "No, take Sterling." And I was just like, dang, dude. Are you gonna teach me my job? You won't let me learn anything. So, I started kinda goin' through Mendo-- sorry, Mendoza and, uh, Sterling. I said, "Okay, he's not gonna teach me my job. You guys gotta do this for me. Like, I can't just sit here and not know what I'm doing. I'd look like an idiot if--"

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: --"if Lieutenant comes in and wants something and I'm like, eh, I don't know how to do that." So, I started utilizing them as my training tools and kind of worked around it. And then, like, when they would go out and do field exercises, Sterling and Mendoza would be like, "These need to be picked up at 520. Can you please go get these radios?" Instead of Sergeant Reed directing it, they started directing me. So, I listened to Sergeant Reed. I followed what he said. I only got locked up once, which, you know, hands behind your back and he was screaming in my face 'cause I ki-- I did. I was--I broke my bearings. I was yelling at him 'cause I was fed up at that point. I was like, you don't 00:46:00wanna teach me this shit. Like, I'm gonna have to frickin' figure it out. Why are you yelling at me? I totally went over and picked up our radios and turned in our broken ones. Why are you yelling at me? And the lieutenant was there when he did it. And he ended up getting a talkin' to but that didn't--didn't really stop him from doing what he was doing. I mean, I was smart enough to document everything and do what I needed to do. And make sure that I had time, date, people, places, things. It wasn't something that was--when you looked at it was me being petty or bitching or, "Eh, I'm a girl and they're discriminating." It was very much just, like, this is where he's failing me and I'm gonna document it.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: You know, s-- harassment started probably about three months into me being there.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Um, discrimination started immediately. But, again, sor-- at the time, Sergeant Hiscock [??], um, who's now Master Sergeant McDaniel [??]. But she really taught me how to navigate that and how to stay outta trouble and not get a bad in-- you know, like, get a bad write-up or get in trouble.

HALASKA: Can you tell me about that? Like, um, give me some examples of how--how she taught you to do these things and what she taught you to do.

AMIDZICH: She literally was like, "If he's not going to teach you, find somebody who will."

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: And that's why I ended up utilizing s-- Steele [??] and Mendoza, like, "Hey guys, like, he's not helping me. You guys see this. Like, let's not--let's call a spade a spade, right. Like, can we do this?" And they were like, "We don't wanna get in trouble." And I was like, "It is your duty as my superior," because they were in charge of me and--'cause they were ser-- specialists, you know.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I'm like, "You guys gotta--gotta do this." So, I kind of went that route. And she--that's how she navigated it. But when it got really bad 'cause it only got worse, um, I ended up starting--he would make me do PT with them because there were more females in Supply. So, then he pulled me away from my boys and he put me into a female aspect because he was like, "You can't run fast as us, so we're not gonna train you. Go do PT with Supply today." And I'd be 00:48:00like, uh, okay. And then Sergeant, um, Hiscock was like, "Take it. Don't--don't fight it. Come do s-- come do it with us." But it got so bad that he was just ignoring me that I ended up starting goin' down to Supply almost every morning and doing work with them because he wouldn't utilize me at all.

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: So, it wa-- it was rough because I was so pumped and I was such a good soldier in AIT and basic that I couldn't understand why the real deal was such a shitty place to be. So, uh, I basically learned how to be a--a ninety-- a 92Yankee.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And become Supply and he never fought it. He never once said, "Why aren't you up here?" It would be, "Clean the office, you have this detail this week, and get with Sergeant Hiscock."

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Like, wh-- are you kidding me right now? Like, all right dude, cool.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: So, um, [background laughter] I just made it work.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: I wasn't happy about it. But I loved being in the military and if this is what--this is what the military was to me. I didn't know any different. I'm brand new. So, it was kind of a bitter--bittersweet moment for me.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: You know, like, I'm actually doing what I love to do and--and being in the job that I wanna have for the rest of my life.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And--and I'm getting' treated like crap 'cause I--'cause I'm a--'cause I'm a female.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: He was--he was a--a shitty NCO [noncommissioned officer]. There's no other way around it. I mean, he ended up losing his security clearance and--and--and I don't know what happened to him. But, yeah.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: It--it--he was just not the right leader for me.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: But that happens. It happens in the military. I mean, there's just nothing you can do about it. You just kinda make sure you're covering your ass. I wrote everything down. I did what I needed to do. But I made myself--I made myself something while I was there. [background laughter] I didn't just sit around and take what he gave me.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: That wasn't good enough for me. Not with the personality and the leadership skills I have, absolutely not. I figured out a way to make my time in the military worth something. I wanted to take something back. I wanted to give something back.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: So, I made it work.

HALASKA: Yeah, yeah.

AMIDZICH: Yeah, mm-hmm.

HALASKA: That's great. Um, well, parts of it are bad. But your--

AMIDZICH: But no, like--

HALASKA: --reaction to it is great, yeah.

AMIDZICH: --yeah, yeah.

HALASKA: Um, was your unit getting ready to deploy at this time?

AMIDZICH: Yes.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Um, so, when I got there in 2002--yes, 2002, um--[laughs] I had to think for a minute. We had already--I think about seven months in, we came down on orders for deployment, so we were prepping for deployment. You know, inventory and packing connexes and all that stuff. It started, like, not too much after I got to HHC.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: So, yeah. We were--everybody was ramped up ready to go, so was I.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: We were about--I think at that point we got orders, I think we were, like, a-- maybe talk of orders. I can't--the timeline's a little blurry--

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: --because of all the other stuff that was going on at the time in my life. But, yeah, we had come down on orders. Everybody was getting' ready. 'Cause I remember getting out when they were three months away from deployment.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Leaving. And I was there that day and I handed out--I bought--outta my 00:51:00own pocket I bought juice, milk, and breakfast sandwiches when they were getting ready to ship out. So, every single one of my people got food.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: 'Cause I was still part of it. Even when I got out I still stayed late with Sergeant Hiscock and helped do inventory and did everything that I was supposed to 'cause I still had secret clearance. I still was safe to be where I was. So, I did--I did everything that I needed to do even after I got out. But, yeah.

HALASKA: Okay. Um, you had mentioned that--so, it's--the negative experiences that you had--

AMIDZICH: Mm-hmm.

HALASKA: --started off with, um, you know, just kind of being told to go clean things and your sergeant not treating you right.

AMIDZICH: Correct.

HALASKA: And then you said that it kind of escalated into harassment. Was that from him or from another soldier?

AMIDZICH: No, it was definitely Sergeant Reed, you know.

HALASKA: Oh, okay, okay.

AMIDZICH: Um, the harassment was just me-- a matter of consistently picking at me and consistently pushing at me and consistently degrading me as a human.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Especially being a female. Um, I ended up--when I was married to Dennis, I ended up losing a baby. And they gave me two weeks of con [convalescent] leave, which isn't normal.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: It's not. But because of the traumatic way that I lost the baby, um, they felt like I needed kind of, like, that mental break too. And in front of the whol-- 'cause I was guidon holder 'cause I was the lowest rank in the company. When I was standing up there one day right before I was going on con leave, uh, he made it a point to call it out in front of everybody and tell me what a piece of shit I was, quote, end quote. Um, because I got two weeks free because I lost a baby and that was bull shit. That I needed to be at work. And I just stood up there with my back to the company embarrassed, crying. Not even gonna lie, tears rolling down my face. But I refused to let him see it.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I just stood there with the guidon waiting for the commander to come out, just mind boggled that--that my sergeant would do that after the traumatic 00:53:00experience that I experienced.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: He just wasn't a good person. He didn't understand women in the military, let alone probably women as a whole. So, it happens.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: There's bad eggs.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, it escalated unfortunately to the point where I took nine months of documentation to my first sergeant after my EOO [Equal Opportunity Officer] [??] had looked at it.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And I said, "Can you please scrub this?" And she [laughs]--she's like, "What do you mean scrub it?" "Can you scrub it and make sure that, like, if this is crap take it out. If you think I'm being petty, take it out. If you think I'm just bein' bitchy, take it out. I want hard facts going to first sergeant when I go there," 'cause I was done. I had finally hit my max point.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: And I went into my first sergeant's office with my battle buddy, Ardock Lang [??]. And, uh, he started reading it. He knew why I was there. I explained everything. I had to go through my chain of command, which I did. And, uh, he got through, like, page two. Looked at it, looked up at me, grabbed the 00:54:00papers, threw 'em at me and said, "Get the fuck outta my office with this shit."

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: And I--literally papers went flying everywhere. So, I'm on the floor and I'm collecting 'em up and Lang is sitting there and she's like, "First Sergeant, like, this--this is happening. Like, I've been witness to it." He's like, "Get the fuck outta my office. I don't have time for this shit." So, I collected my papers, thanked him for his time, and walked outta the office. And went to my EOO and said, "Now what do I do? My first sergeant told me to get the fuck out of his office." Like, so, it only put me into some serious depression and all the stuff that I was already dealing with. So, I was already dealing with discrimination, harassment, loss of baby, loss of marriage. Um, and just chaos. I was living in hell.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And that was kinda, like, what broke me.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: You know, like, I had had enough at that point. So, then I--you could see the physical aspect of it come out 'cause I--I had taken, like, a year of 00:55:00just crap from Sergeant Reed, you know.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And just was done. I asked for a transfer, got denied. Like, I did everything that I was supposed to do. I did it the proper way. I documented it the proper way. I did exactly what I was told to do. And I still got shit on and I was like, well, that's crappy. [laughs]

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: So, it was just a bad chain of command unfortunately.

HALASKA: Yeah. Um, was your EOO part of the company or they--?

AMIDZICH: Yes, she was.

HALASKA: Okay, she was.

AMIDZICH: Yeah, it was Sergeant Hiscock.

HALASKA: Oh, okay, there we go.

AMIDZICH: Mm-hmm. Yeah, she was appointed that position, so.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I had her scrub it before I did anything with it. Because realistically that's what everybody should do is go to your EOO and say, "Is this even valid? Do I even have a valid point? Should I even be going to the first sergeant?" And she was like, "Absolutely."

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I just wish I would've taken her with me [laughter] 'cause she probably would've lost her crap on him 'cause she was like that.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: She was a--she still is a badass. [laughs]

HALASKA: That's awesome, um.

AMIDZICH: Yeah. So, it was just--it was sad. It really put me into a state of depression and then it just kinda spiraled after that.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Um, when, um--uh, when did you decide that it was probably time to get out?

AMIDZICH: I didn't decide--

HALASKA: You didn't? Okay.

AMIDZICH: --that it was time to get out. Um, I act--

HALASKA: I apologize, yeah.

AMIDZICH: Don't--nope. You're absolutely fine. Um, I unfortunately went into a severe depression, ended up at the hospital--

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: --um, where they took fifteen minutes to evaluate me and wrote--which I still have in my medical records and kept a copy of it because it was--it's my clarification. It's my defense. It's me saying, yeah, obviously. Uh, they said through all the traumatic events that were happening within that year--'cause it was that year where I went through all of this losing the baby, losing the marriage, you know, all this chaos. He said that the way I reacted was absolutely human. That's what he wrote, "She's human."

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Any human would react this way. So, they, um, said that I had severe depression. And, um, the next thing I know--'cause I didn't show up to 00:57:00formation. Um, they ended up having to--my, uh, ex-husband [laughs] actually had to come to the house to take me in 'cause I--I--I don't wanna say, like, catatonic. I just shut down. I was just overwhelmed with all the trauma. I was overwhelmed with all the negativity. I was overwhelmed with how first sergeant handled me. I just broke.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: The one time in my life. The place you don't wanna break, I broke. But it's--I'm human and I'm not gonna apologize for, like, anything that I went through or--or how I handled anything.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: 'Cause it's just how I reacted. And, uh, unfortunately Captain Shoemaker [??] was taking over for Ca-- we had a transition going on. First sergeant was leaving, new first sergeant was coming in, new commander was coming in. And, uh, her way of handling the situation was calling me into her office two weeks after, uh, the--the medical stint and telling me that they were chaptering me.

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: And I looked at her [background noise] and I said, "What does that mean?" And she's like, "You're getting out of the military. We don't think you're fit for duty." And I said, "I'm sorry f-- ss-- ma'am, what?" And sh-- I'm like--she's like, "Yeah, you're--we--we've decided that--that you no longer should be in the service." And I said, "But this is my life." Like, I don't--mm. [shows emotion] I didn't have a plan b. There was no plan b.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: I was dying in battle or I was getting chapter-- or not chaptered, I was getting retired.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Those were my--that was my plan. I was so shocked 'cause, a, I was alone. I didn't have a battle with me. Captain Holly [??] was standing here, Captain Shoemaker was at her desk. Holly, Shoemaker were rotating pos-- a commander position. And I just was standing there, like, defeated. I was defeated. They--they won. They won. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know that 00:59:00I had the legal right to decline the chapter until I sat with Legal. I didn't know any of th-- nobody told me any of this. They just chaptered me. They just decided that I wasn't fit for duty because of the harassment and discrimination that was going on. Like, really? Like, now I'm a problem child because you guys don't wanna frickin' man up and handle your shit? And, uh, she's like, "You have to sign that." And I'm like--and I was hyperv-- I remember I was a tr-- so I wasn't helping the cause because [laughs] I was a train wreck. I was hyperventilating and crying and looking at her going, "What does that mean? What does that mean?" And she's like, "That means you're getting out of the military." And I looked at her and I said, "No, I don't wanna get outta the military." And she's like, "No, you are getting out of the military. You're not fit for duty. You need to get out." And I'm like, "But I don't wanna get out." And she's like, "Stop talkin' back to me. Lock it up." She put me at the fucking position of attention, told me that I had no choice that I had to sign it. And I didn't know any better. Nobody told me I could've fought that. Nobody told me 01:00:00that I could've not signed it that day. I didn't even have representation with me. So, I signed it 'cause that's what my commander told me to do and I was an E2. I had nothing in my head. I was twenty-three years old.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: I had lost two babies at that point. I was out of a relationship. I--my marriage fell apart. I was being harassed daily. I was being discriminated against since the moment I showed up with boobs. And I was just broken.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: So, I signed it. Then the process started. And I looked like a piece of shit and everybody treated me like a piece of shit 'cause I was getting out of the military 'cause they were chaptering me. And they--they told me that the--the chapter was not fit for duty. What was on my chapter is a multiple personality disorder, which I love because they had to pick a box. And they chose that that was the one they were gonna chapter me out on. So, for the rest 01:01:00of my life I now have a stigma that I have a mental disorder of a multiple personal-- which, I--um, if you read the report you'll see that I don't. And you can talk to any of my counselors and realize I don't. So, there was--so, that was so incredibly traumatic for me.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: And I completely started shutting down even more and I was a drone. I went into work. I did what they said. I left work. I did all my duties, my extra on top of extra on top of extra duty. Like, Thursday you have CQ and Saturday you have CQ. So, I went Thursday all day, slept Friday, came back, Saturday all day, slept Sunday, came back. And there--and he did it every weekend, almost. So, First Sergeant put me on a rotation 'cause I was getting out. Every other weekend I lost. Freed up people to do their real job, as he would say to me. Um, so, I just kinda went through the process and dealt with everything. And 01:02:00unfortunately, I wish it--I wish I had better news and say that it got better, but it didn't.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, about a month, a month and a half before I was to get outta the military, I ended up, um, getting raped by my section sergeant.

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: Or--well, section sergeant. He's a CW2 [Chief Warrant Officer 2]. So, it was--it was--that was--

HALASKA: Warrant officer? No.

AMIDZICH: Yes, mm-hmm.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Yeah. So, he took advantage of the situation one day when I was stuck on CQ by myself.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And I was forced to be there all night. And then I had to go home and tell my sister and Sergeant Hiscock. And, as I said, Sergeant Hiscock's the EOO. Guess what she had to do?

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: She had to tell the commander what's going on. I begged her. I begged and plea-- I said, "I am so close to getting outta this hell hole. Do not tell 01:03:00them. I'm just gonna deal with it and I'll be fine." She was like, "Uh, you're a train wreck." I was like, "I know. Just gimme time. I'll put myself back together. I got this."

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I slept. Got up the next morning, had to go back to the place where it happened because I was on CQ again. And I broke down and I--I just couldn't do it. I was hiding under a desk just sobbing and my sergeant--[laughs] the sergeant there called Sergeant Hiscock and was like, "Private Amidzich is having a full-on bol-- blown-out meltdown. [laughs] We need to do something about this." She came in and she looked at me and she's like, "It's time. I have to tell the commander. I can't--" she got reprimanded for not saying it right away, but.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: And then I went to CID [Criminal Investigation Division] and the Military Police and all that two days after it happened. That was another traumatic experience. Unfortunately, I spent eight hours there. Standing, sitting, writing, reading it back to a camera, standing in front of a camera, 01:04:00writing it on a computer, hand writing it. It was the most horrible experience. Never did--once did I have a female with me. Never once did I have somebody who even frickin' believed me.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: And I literally got grilled by all of these people for eight hours. And I didn't go in until 6 p.m. They literally tried to break me. Now, in their defense, as much as this sounds really weird, I am a soldier who's getting chaptered for not being fit for duty, right. That's what I'm seeing. They're seeing a shit bag soldier getting chaptered out of the military who's now saying that a warrant officer raped her. [Heels clicking] Kinda can see the way they were coming from because SHARP [Sexual Harassment/Assault Response and Prevention] wasn't something that was actually in the system yet, which is the sexual harassment prevention education thing that they do now. But, um, they 01:05:00tried to break me. And I refused to break because I didn't have to fight something. I didn't have to lie. This is what happened and I will tell you the story over a hundred times because that's what happened. So, they did--so, then it went off. I had the next--so--so, that was a Saturday. So, when I came into work on Monday, I got called into the first sergeant's office, only maybe a month and a half after he told me to get the fuck out of his office with my bullshit. He sat me down and made me sign a no contact order, not that--he did not explain what that meant. He didn't unders-- I didn't understand why I was getting this. So, I started crying 'cause obviously trauma's trauma. And he screamed at me in front of, like, four people as I'm signing this paper, "Stop fucking crying." Like, it was so embarrassing. "I don't have time for this shit." And I just sat there and I signed the no contact order and walked away from it because I had no idea what it was for. Everybody signs a no contact 01:06:00order. You're not supposed to be around that person when you got raped and blah. I didn't know that. Nobody told me, so I thought I was getting reprimanded. I thought I was the only one writ-- signing that. I thought I was in trouble.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: But I wasn't. So, then it went off to the higher ups and to CID and MPs and all that. And so then they had to do their investigation. So, they took his statement and Hiscock's statement and my statement and all that and they compiled it in this thing. And it went off to wherever it goes off to to get processed. In that timeframe, I'm now getting chaptered. In that timeframe, he's supp-- he has orders for Korea or--or somewhere foreign. And so--but they were like six months out, so they s-- expedited it and shipped him out quicker because if he didn't get prosecuted at Fort Lewis it wouldn't follow him. He never got prosecuted. He never got in trouble for it. He n-- they did nothing with it. Uh, I spent ten years, no lie, getting my Freedom of Information Act. 01:07:00Didn't take ten years to get the paperwork, and I'm still fighting them. But they redacted everything he said, so I have no idea what the full case looks like. However, I have a little piece of paper that I keep in my sock drawer that says, "Enough probably cause to prosecute." And that alone is the only reason that I am probably standing here today and didn't become a statistic because I had somebody at CID validate me. And that was exactly what I needed.

HALASKA: Um, okay. So, you said that you have that little piece of paper that said--

AMIDZICH: Yep. That was from CID.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: It was the full report that I got from the Freedom of Information Act.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: And, um, by having that, it was my--it was my validation card.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: I didn't care what anybody thought of me. I didn't care what 01:08:00anybody--none of it. Um, because most people believed me ironically. Um, he probably never really gave off that vibe that he was that kind of shit bag. Um, however I ran into Mr. Fisher [??], who worked directly with--with Chief [??]. And, um, he saw me in the PX [Post Exchange]. I wanna say it was, like, eight years later. And--and he remembered me. And I was like, "Oh my gosh, Mr. Fisher." He's like, "Yeah, I'm a CW3 now," or somethin' like that. It was--it was awesome. And, uh, he pulls me aside and he's like, "I gotta ask you a really tough question and I'm sorry. But he really did it didn't he?" And I said, "Well, I'm kind of insulted that you're even asking me if or did because he did. There's no question." He goes, "I kinda--I kind of figured that." He's like, "I--I didn't like the way he looked at you when we were in field together and some of the stuff that he did, I--I feel like maybe I should've said something. So, I'm really sorry." And I was like, "Don't apologize. You didn't do this. He 01:09:00did this." And he's like, "Yeah, but I kinda saw things that maybe, now looking back, I should've probably said something." And I'm like, "We all learn--live and learn."

HALASKA: Yep.

AMIDZICH: "I'm okay. I'm on my two feet. I'm walkin' and talkin'."

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: "Carry on." So, that was, like, validation.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Just having--I just--that little bit of validation over time really helped.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm, good.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Um, what--um, is there anything else from that time, um, at Fort Lewis that you want to discuss or talk about? Even, like, fun times or good times kinda before we--

AMIDZICH: Yeah, I think--I think I really truly want people to understand that though my experience was pretty shitty, it's also not as--like, some of it's common, but most of wh-- what I went through was very uncommon. Everything bad that could've happened to a female in the military happened to me. But my love for the military still runs strong and my desire to have never left it is 01:10:00something that I'm still learning how to grieve the loss of my military career because I was in it to win it. And I was n-- like I said, I didn't have a plan b. There was no plan b. It was military, death, retirement. That was my plan b. [laughs] So, having it taken away from me took me a really long time to--to heal from it. But it never stopped. Even after the harassment and the discrimination and the rape and the chapter, I still stayed till midnight, two o'clock helping them prep for deployment. I still was there. I was still with my unit. I was still with my battles. I still wanted to--to get 'em ready for war. I didn't want to stop serving even though they took that away from me. And luckily, Sergeant Hiscock gave me that opportunity to continue to heal and serve. And to the point where I ended up becoming her caregiver for her sixteen-year-old son when I was twenty-six years old when they deployed.

HALASKA: Mm.

AMIDZICH: I was goin' to school full time and taking care of a sixteen-year-old so she could deploy 'cause she had no plan--she didn't have a backup. He didn't--his dad wasn't in the picture.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: So, I became his caretaker for a year while they deployed because my mission never left me, and it still hasn't.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: You know, it's--it's--when something is embedded in you at a very young age and you know exactly what you wanna do and it's not just, like, this hiccup or passion or something cool. Like, it was part of my DNA was to be in the military to serve. And--and would I go back and do it all over again?

HALASKA: Mm-hmm. Uh, tell me about that year that you were talking care--taking care of Sergeant Hiscock's son and while she was deployed.

AMIDZICH: Oh, my gosh. Woo, that was tough. We lost a lot of people. This time of year is really tough for me.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Um, from, you know, No-- November fifteenth through January is pretty rough because we lost a lot of good people. It w-- you know--

HALASKA: Where were they deployed?

AMIDZICH: Uh, I wanna say K-- Kabul, but I could be off on that. It's been a hot minute.

HALASKA: Okay. Yeah, yeah.

AMIDZICH: And there have been many deployments between. But, um, she was Supply sergeant so she did convoy after convoy after convoy.

HALASKA: God.

AMIDZICH: So, I was consistently, like, paranoid that I was gonna get two green suits. Um, during that year, I was--unfortunately, I opened the door to one set of green suits when I was at a girlfriend's house on base. They started talking and I went, "I'm not the spouse." And I shut the door.

HALASKA: Oh, Jesus.

AMIDZICH: And I stood there going, oh my God. Okay, I have to go get her so she can know that her husband's dead. And it was probably one of the most traumatic things next to everything else I went through. Um, and I went into the kitchen 01:13:00and said, "There's people at the door for you." And she knew by looking at my face 'cause I had already lost it. And she said, "Okay." So, I had to--I was there with her and her kids during the--during the time where they had to tell her that her husband had passed because he had gotten blown up by an IED [Improvised Explosive Device]. And so, like, I have real connections to--to--to deal with trauma because I watched what that's like. I mean, I lost a buddy, David, got killed by a sniper. We lost a bunch of people in the chow hall bombings coming, the anniversary of it. And Sterling and Mendoza, they were there. They were sitting at the table when it blew up. I would've been there. I would've been sitting at that table because that--that's what we would've done. We would've went to chow together. It's just how it would've worked. Would I have survived? I don't know. Mendoza lost--or Sterling lost some fingers. Mendoza took a bunch of shrapnel pretty--pretty profound to his back I heard. 01:14:00And my ex-boyfriend pulled twenty-two dead bodies out. So, it's just--it's tough. Tough time of year. But in that year it was the constant anxiety and the constant panic. And making sure this sixteen-year-old went to high school was a pain in the ass. [Halaska laughs] I mean, and that boy had more water dumped on him in the morning than anybody. I was like, "Listen dude, if you don't get up--I gotta go to work. But if you don't get up, I'm gonna throw water on you." And he's like, "Eh." So, I did throw cold water on him. He got up outta bed. [Halaska laughs] We made it work. It was a good time. I mean, I took--he--he lived. He's still alive today, so I did [laughter]--I did a good job taking care of him. Still very, um--very hard time.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Lost--lost some really good people. Even when I was in the service, we lost a really good guy. K. Willie Sullivan [??] killed himself next to his wife in bed. Linda's [??] one of my best friends. I took her in after he killed 01:15:00himself and we--we made it work.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: She was Supply as well, so. And we were really close. But, yeah, that year was tough. It was tough. But I--I graduated with honors.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And he lived barely. [Halaska laughs] And, you know, when she came home it was such a relief. Not because her--she got to take care of her son, but it was because I didn't have to, like, lose sleep any more. I didn't have to worry about neighbors--knocking on the door between 8 and 6 p.m. is really traumatic.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Because they don't come outside those windows. They stay in a certain window when they come to your house to tell you that your significant other or spouse or friend or what-- you know, I would've--it would've been just a friend, right--is gone. So, there's that trauma. So, when she came home and she was safe and she was sleeping in her own bed--'cause we were roommates. Um, like I--I had never slept--the best sleep I ever had was the first night she came home. Even though we talked till, like, 3:00 in the morning just catchin' up and just bein' 01:16:00excited that she was home.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: But, yeah, that year was tough. But it was--it taught me so much about me and how much my love for my country still existed. And I just kept going. Like, I didn't stop. I just wanted to make sure that I made an impact somehow in some capacity.

HALASKA: Yeah. How long did you stay out--out there?

AMIDZICH: Um, I lived in Seattle area until two--we moved--I went to Germany--

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: --with my unit ironically. I got a contracting job out there with them. Um, so I stayed there until 2006, '07. And then went to Germany for a year, worked for, um, a German corporation. Um, and then helped with, like, the logistics. I worked helping move stuff around Germany and keeping track of 2-SCR's [2nd Cavalry Regiment] equipment and stuff like that.

HALASKA: SCRs?

AMIDZICH: 2-SCR.

HALASKA: 2-SCR. What's that?

AMIDZICH: Cavalry unit.

HALASKA: Oh, okay.

AMIDZICH: It's, like, the--they--uh, 1-25th transitioned over and became a cavalry unit when they went over to--to Vil-- uh, Rose Barracks Germany, so.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: But I was a civilian at the time.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: So, I had a lotta fun in Europe with my friends 'cause I lived with Lisa [??] again--

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: --as a roommate in Germany. And we tore up Germany. We had a blast. Best time. One of my best times thus far in my life was living in Germany havin' a blast with all my people.

HALASKA: Tell me a little bit about that, like just a--a few fun times or something like that.

AMIDZICH: Oh, my gosh. Um, [laughs] we used to go to Kate's Irish Pub in Amberg, Germany. And we brought in a crew and it was tight. There was, like, officers, um, high-enlisted, and a bunch of civilians. And we didn't care. We were like, screw it. I know that that's, like, a no-go. You're not supposed to. But we're talkin' about, like E6, E7, E8s and warrant officers and--and, like, first lieutenants. Like, it wasn't, like, super high up. But we all, like, just didn't 01:18:00give a shit 'cause we were all friends and we just were in a foreign country and we had fun. We literally went everywhere together. This crew was, like, twelve of us; six, seven of us would go out to different countries and su-- just, it was such a great time, such a great time. And I absolutely had the absolute love of my life. I met him there. He was T-- he was a warrant officer, just great time. Like, such good memories in Germany. It really kinda healed me in a way because I was with my people again and I was doing what I wanted to do. I already knew Supply 'cause I was taught it when I was in. [laughter] So, it was an easy transition over. I'm still in contact with--with my chief that was runnin' it, and, yeah.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm. Um, what was the contracting company that you were with?

AMIDZICH: Uh-oh, GBHD.

HALASKA: G-B-H-D, okay.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: And it was a German company?

AMIDZICH: It's a German company.

HALASKA: So, it's, like, one long word?

AMIDZICH: Uh-huh, yep, sure is.

HALASKA: Yeah, okay. [laughs] Okay, GBHD.

AMIDZICH: I even still have my paystub to prove to people that I was contracted 01:19:00by a German company.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Which they have horrible taxes. [Halaska laughs] Um, half my paycheck went to taxes, no lie. But it was amazing. Great corporation that I worked for. They were really good to work with, super easy.

HALASKA: Okay, excellent. Um, all right. Where--where'd you go from there? Where--?

AMIDZICH: After Germany, I came back to D.C. area.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Uh, wasn't doing well. You know, just tryin' to acclimate back to being a civilian 'cause I had--even though I had gotten out, I was still so tight with the unit that I felt like I still was just doing military stuff. 'Cause I was, like, working on my degree, um, working as a--a lead front desk receptionist at a gym, was a fitness junkie, you know, like--so, I was still very much involved. Every time they needed a volunteer, I was there. Didn't matter.

HALASKA: Wow, yeah.

AMIDZICH: So, coming back to the D.C. area to be with my sister, um, was tough. I didn't have a really good grasp on--on who I was, what I was anymore because it wasn't the military and I didn't know how to ha-- handle anything. So, I 01:20:00ended up, like, being there for, like, nine months. Quit my job, lost the shit on my director one day 'cause he took my idea. And I just--military bearings went right out the window. But I also had PTSD [post-traumatic stress disorder] and traumatic brain injury. I wasn't dealing with any of this crap, right. Moved back to Washington 'cause that's what I knew. And then I was homeless 'cause I didn't know how to acclimate. I had a job. I was working at a retirement community. I had a car. But I didn't have a home.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And I didn't wanna tell people I was homeless. And then I went to the VA [Veterans Affairs] and said, "Can you help me?" And they're like, "No. We don't have any services for you. Find a women's shelter." I was like, oh, awesome, cool. Hadn't put my claim in at that point, you know. Then I met Lilly's [??] dad. Um, and we ended up getting together and then I moved down to Louisiana. We had Lilly. I got married. We moved to Utah. Pretty traumatic experience there, left her dad, moved back to Washington 'cause, again, it's 01:21:00what I know. It's who I--that--my identity will always be Washington.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Because that's where I--that's where I fell in love. And--and what I mean by that is that's where I fell in love with the military, even though it was so traumatic.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: So, it's always been my kinda, like, go back to. It's home. It's easy. I know every street, every person, everything. And then, um, just finally, like, started getting help. Filed my claim, did all the stuff I needed to do, and just started bringing myself back around. So, it's been, uh--it's been an interesting seven years.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: Sure has. But I, uh, finally pulled my head outta my fourth point of contact [Halaska laughs] via the VA system here is amazing. I've been to thirteen different VAs. This is one of the best we have in the country. And they really dug in and wanted to help me and they've been absolutely wonderful.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: So, I--I--I can't say that I'm healed or I'm--I'm anything, but I can tell you that I am functioning at a level that I never thought I would because I 01:22:00got the help I needed 'cause I'm not too proud.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm, yeah.

AMIDZICH: And that's something that our veterans really need to know is that it's there. The help is there.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: You just have to want it bad enough and I did.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: What kind of--um, just if you don't mind me asking.

AMIDZICH: Sure, I don't mind.

HALASKA: What kind of, um, assistance did you get from the VA here that was so helpful for you?

AMIDZICH: Oh, my gosh. So, they immediately started me, uh, in counseling.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, and then they have--they got me with a medication management doctor to try to figure out new medications to help me sleep or to help with the PTSD and the anxiety and all those things that kinda come with it. Um, I--I ac-- I misspoke before. My traumatic brain injury didn't come until the domestic violence with my--my ex. But he was a soldier and he has--he has severe PTSD. Um, but I--they helped me learn that I'm--there's nothing wrong with me. I'm just wired differently.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And sometimes you have to just learn how to work around the wiring 01:23:00that's different. And they listened and they--they--they actually--if I said, "No, I don't wanna do that drug," we found something else. I was an advocate. I took my victim mentality and decided to be an advocate for myself. So, I'm no longer a victim anymore. That is my past. That is what happened to me. I get to choose to be an advocate for myself and for others who have gone through the same thing. So, that's--that's where I'm at now. And that all has to--really truly give my--my shout out to the VA because they took the time to understand what was really wrong with me instead of just shoving drugs down my throat. But that was because I refused to just take whatever they said.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: I was like, "That's not good enough," or, "I don't like that. Those side effects scare me. Let's find something else." But they will do it. They will and they did. And now I'm in, um--it's like rapid eye movement training. They--they're--they're teaching my brain to rewire itself some-- and it's intense and very, very, very, very, very difficult. But I want--I want to be a 01:24:00better person and I want to be able to be a better mom. And--and someday hopefully have, like, a healthy, normal relationship. That would be really great.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Um, but I'm willing to put in the work and the time that--but those resources are there. You just have to want it bad enough.

HALASKA: Yeah.

AMIDZICH: So, yeah. They're great.

HALASKA: Um, that's fantastic.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Um, were you involved in any other veterans' organizations over the past few years?

AMIDZICH: Oh, yeah, you could say that.

HALASKA: Okay.

AMIDZICH: Um, I was second runner-up for Miss Veteran America 2018.

HALASKA: Oh, congratulations.

AMIDZICH: Final Salute Inc. is a non-for-profit organization that helps homeless women veterans and their children stay off the streets, as well as helping women who are transitioning out of the military so that that disconnect is connected. Because when you get out, you don't know what the hell you're gonna do. So, Next Uniform is a program that they put on and they provide everything from headshots, uni-- uh, shoes, clothes, makeup, hair, uh, LinkedIn page, resume writing, um, resources out the wazoo. It's all free. So, they do amazing stuff. 01:25:00Final Salute is a--is a--is an amazing--Jas Boothe won the W award. She just won another awar-- she's a very close friend of mine and--and a lot of my light because she keeps me goin'. And she is--she beat head, throat, and neck cancer. She beat Katrina who took her house and her life. And she refused to give up. And she is--she is legit somebody that I look up to. She's my kinda everyday--she was a major in the military, Army. And she was--she's an amazing human.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Keeps me r-- keeps me motivated and goin'. Gotta catch up with her is what I would say, so.

HALASKA: Yeah, is she in Wisconsin?

AMIDZICH: No, she's in D.C. area.

HALASKA: Oh, okay.

AMIDZICH: Yeah, she's fantastic. She'll--she'll take a phone call.

HALASKA: Okay. [laughs]

AMIDZICH: She sure will.

HALASKA: Um, that's fantastic.

AMIDZICH: Yeah.

HALASKA: Is, uh--let me think. What--um, so, where--where are you working now?

AMIDZICH: I work as the membership director for the Veterans Chamber--Wisconsin 01:26:00Veterans Chamber of Commerce. It is--I used to work for, um, a corporation and I volunteered with the Chamber for quite some time. I do a lot of singing around the state and whatnot. And I did their business conference and then just fell in love with the organization as a whole. And when the deputy membership position came up, they reached out to me and I took it. And then surprisingly a month and a half, two months later, I was the membership director.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: And I love every bit of this. I get to work with my battles every day and the mission is to make Wisconsin the most veteran friendly state in the country. And--and do the best we can. And right now we're number two for benefits. But, um, Texas only beats us out because of the weather is what I've decided. [Halaska laughs] We're an awesome--we're an awesome state. We--we really give--we really give a shit about our veterans. I mean, in a--in a full capacity, full spectrum. And that matters to me. I wanna be somewhere where not only what I do is impacting my veteran community, but it's also impacting my 01:27:00business community because they go hand in hand. And enhancing the economic growth of Wisconsin is super important to me. I wanna make sure we thrive and survive and we are number one, so.

HALASKA: Mm-hmm.

AMIDZICH: Yeah, I love my job [laughs] very much so.

HALASKA: That's awesome. Yay.

AMIDZICH: Yay.

HALASKA: Um, so just, uh, wrapping up--

AMIDZICH: Sure.

HALASKA: --at the time, um, can you--can you just say, um, to someone who's listening to this interview, um, what do you want them to take away from it, from your experience?

AMIDZICH: I want them to know that everybody's experience in the military is always gonna be personal. It's always gonna be different. There's no--there's no way to say that when you go into the military and you're a female that you're gonna have these things happen to you. It happens a lot. But it's happening in the civilian world too, so it's no different. Just remember where your heart is. Remember that you are in--you're going into the military or supporting the military because it's a calling. It is. One percent of us get that calling, and 01:28:00it's so deep that we sign the line at the cost of our life. And that matters. It matters to the civilians. It matters to the people that we're fighting for. And it matters to our country thriving and surviving. Don't take my story and think negatively about the military. You can think negatively about the people. That's fine. I'm okay with that. But the overarch that I really want people to understand is is that when the calling is embedded in your heart, follow it. Because I would do it all again with the same outcome just to say that I'm a veteran and I get to wor-- wear the uniform. 'Cause that'll forever be one of the proudest moments [shows emotion] was graduating basic training. I remember it like it was yesterday. And it--it's silly, but I just remember when they said, "Eyes right," that was--that was it. That was when I got to--to look at my dad as I walked by. So, don't let what happened to me be a deterring factor. If 01:29:00anything, use it as a--a catalyst. And that you would fight for those who--who have been through some shitty shit. But I love my country and I am proud of my service no matter what.

HALASKA: All right. Well, thank you very much.

AMIDZICH: Thank you.

HALASKA: Yep.